Friday, December 21, 2007

To all my politically correct (i.e., oxymoronic) friends:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. Now, please return to the wormholes in the woodwork you crawled out of.

To all my Kewl Christian friends:

Have a Very Blessed and Merry Christmas and a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year!
And, last but not least, to all the rest of you of other faiths,
Happy Holy Days!
--William Wheatley

Hey y'all:

Woke up this morning on the eve of the WORLD'S GREATEST JEWISH CHRISTMAS PARTY,
& witnessed the boss come into the office, look in the paper and see that one of our Section 8 tenants had stabbed somebody at the high school and declared,
"Man, I hope she don't get kicked off the program."

[At 2:37 A.M.,
Northport Fuzz is lighting up the office right now. Two cruisers chased some po' cat over the bridge & seeing as how we're located at the foot of the bridge- we get to see all the public safety action!-
I'LL BE DAMNED!!!! They let the po' boy slide!]

Saturday, December 29 will mark the 25th anniversary of Coach Bryant's last game.
http://myspace.com/paulbearbryant
http://daybeardied.com
Let's all plan to propose a toast to THE COACH that day.



Designed by KEVIN PAKE

Bama Queen http://myspace.com/fiddledeedeeme
http://myspace.com/adkinsjohnrainey
informed us of A.C. Allen's death today.
Please click on this link:
http://www.legacy.com/Link.asp?I=LS000099877263X

A.C. & my Mother were the same age.
[it's so kewl that all uv us Srs '68
were born in '50-
name any year & we know exactly how old we were]

Getting A.C. as principal of DHS for OUR SENIOR YEAR
was absolute
DELIVERANCE FROM EVIL!!!!
[under W. Brad's regime, that imbecile Trawick tried to implicate me in the cagging of Britt in the stairwell. I beat that rap but I was definitely a member of the inner circle
{a.k.a. ZERO- At Zero, NW FL we think outside the circle. Sometime, we even think outside the CIRCLE CITY!}
in the foiled plot to handcuff W. Brad to the flagpole.]

I got pulled before A.C. on only one time.

Miz Priss typing teacher Langford tried to make me pay for a brand new typing book.
[I'd accidently made a mark counting letters in a typing exercise
& when I asked to borrow ink eradicator,
the bitch told me I was gonna have to buy the book & I told her,
"Not just 'No' but 'HELL, NO!!!' "]

The next day in typing class we had a substitute teacher & right after we got started
typing, Miss Langford suddenly showed up and took my po' broke barefooted Rebel ass to A.C.'s office.

I knew Mr. Allen pretty well because I had a part-time job at the Houston Memorial Library & I helped his retarded son, Clayton, out a lot when he'd visit the library.
When Clayton visited the library, I could clock out because Mrs. Baxley made sho' I became Clayton's adult supervision.

Anywayzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

I'm sitting there in the office with A.C. & Miss Priss & A.C. asks,"Robert, how are you going to take care of the problem with this book?"

I looked straight at Langford, locked eyes with her & said,"I ain't gonna take care of THIS book & I don't care what you do to me!"

"Why do you feel that way, Robert?"

"Christmas is coming up & I've got better things to spend my money on than for A BOOK THAT AIN'T EVEN HURT!"

"Well, Robert, you knew from the beginning of the year that these were new typing textbooks & that the rule was that anyone who defaced a book would have to buy it."

"Mr. Allen, I can't help what kind of rules these teachers make up but I've got better things to spend my money on than a dang book that's not even hurt!"

"What do you mean by 'better things to spend my money on'?

"Sir, I need to spend every nickel I make on Christmas presents and gasoline!"

"How do you make your money?"

"I unload trucks for Mr. Strickland across the street early in the morning. He's got a shower so I'm able to clean up before class. I work in the afternoons down at the library & my Daddy pays me good money Sunday afternoons to change tires at Creel Truck Line & Sanitary Dairy."

"Sounds like you earn a lot."

"Yes ,Sir! I do!
& I need every penny of it!"

"What do you spend your money on."

"Oh, I go out with some of the Dothan girls but I've got a girlfriend in New Brockton & another one in Enterprise & all of that takes everything I've got &
I'm not buying this stupid book!"

"How'd you get girlfriends in New Brockton and Enterprise?"

"I've worked at the Boy Scout Reservation near Clintonville since '65 & I met a lot of girls around there at bar-b-ques & ballgames."

"I hunt deer in Clintonville."

Oh Lord!
A LIGHT CAME DOWN FROM HEAVEN AT THAT MOMENT.

From then on A.C. & I just talked about Rort Fucker & Clintonville.
Miz Priss was in shock!

Finally, A.C. asks me, "O.K. Robert, one more time, how are you going to take care of this book."

"Like I said, I ain't taking care of it. THIS AIN'T RIGHT!"

"O.K. Robert, I want you to bring your daddy to the office Monday morning."

Oh, I knew I was gonna have to bring Earl to school but it didn't matter.
I'D BEAT THAT STUPID HAIR SPRAYED BITCH!

Monday morning, I was eating breakfast & Daddy called me into his half-bath beside the kitchen where he was shaving.

He said, "You're right about this deal with the book but I'm gonna take care of it."

"How's that Daddy?"

"You are never going to have to pay for that book.
Tell Mr. Allen to make out an invoice for the book & mail it to the office & the company will pay for it."

"DADDY!!!!"

"Son, you can't afford to get in trouble during your Senior year. Give Mr. Allen my business card & tell him to bill me."

& that's what I did & I went back to class & A.C. never sent the bill and I rubbed Langford's nose in it for the rest of the year.

DEAR LORD,
THANK YOU JESUS AND SAM PRICE JONES FOR A. C. ALLEN !!!!

[I hope Brad Stephens' got a grave somewhere because
I'M READY RIGHT NOW TO
go piss on it!]

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

BEST,
RR

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Hey Robert, nice message. Thanks. I wish all Christians would
practice what Christ taught. Forgiveness and love your enemies. I,
for one, make sure I hold no grudges. We are all fucked up and most
of us trying to do our best and that is the important thing: forgive
yourself for your fuckups, start anew.

Have a great Christmas and holiday season.

ken babbs
--
Living in the moment. Emerson and the transcendentalists taught that
if you really get into the mundane tasks, you transcend your normal
woes and cares and worriesome thoughts and find real glee. Like Baba
Ram Dass: Be here now. Like me, doing the dishes.

http://www.skypilotclub.com

From: Arnie
Date: December 19, 2007 12:02:39 PM CST
To: Arnie
Subject: FW: FW: AGENDA FOR THE 2008 DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION


AGENDA FOR THE 2008 DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION

7:00 pm Opening flag burning
>>
>>
>>
>> 7:15 pm Pledge of Allegiance to the U.N. in Spanish
>>
>>
>>
>> 7:20 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 7:25 pm Nonreligious prayer and worship with Jessie Jackson
>> and Al Sharpton
>>
>>
>>
>> 7:45 pm Ceremonial tree hugging
>>
>>
>>
>> 7:55 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 8:00 pm How I Invented the Internet - Al Gore
>>
>>
>>
>> 8:15 pm Gay Wedding - Barney Frank presiding
>>
>>
>>
>> 8:35 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 8:40 pm Our Troops are War Criminals -- John Kerry
>>
>>
>>
>> 9.00 pm Saddam Memorial Rally - Cindy Sheehan and Susan
>> Sarandon
>>
>>
>>
>> 11.00 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 11:05 pm Collection for the Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant
>> fund -- Barbara Streisand
>>
>>
>>
>> 11:15 pm Free the Freedom Fighters from Guantanamo Bay - Sean
>> Penn
>>
>>
>>
>> 11:30 pm Oval Office Affairs - William Jefferson Clinton
>>
>>
>>
>> 11:45 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 11:50 pm How George Bush Brought Down the World Trade
>> Towers -- Howard Dean & Rosie O'Donnell
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:15 am "Truth in Broadcasting Award" -- Presented to Dan
>> Rather by Michael Moore
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:25 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:30 am Satellite address by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:45 am Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Nancy Pelosi
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:50 am Speech and toast by Hugo Chavez to the departure of
>> "the great satan", 'W' Bush
>>
>>
>>
>> 12:55 am Hillary proposes a toast to our 89 million new
>> Democratic Mexican voters
>>
>>
>>
>> 1:00 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast to the extinction of
>> the Republican party.
>>
>>
>>
>> 1:05 am Coronation of Hillary Rodham Clinton
>>
>>
>>
>> 1:30 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
>>
>>
>>
>> 1:35 am Bill Clinton asks Ted Kennedy to drive Hillary home
>>
>>





RR~
Good One! Here's my fav:
The light of God surrounds us.
The love of God enfolds us.
The power of God protects us.
The presence of God watches over us.
Wherever we are God is and all is well.
--
THE BamaQueen
ROLL TIDE ROLL!
--
THE BamaQueen
ROLL TIDE ROLL!

K:

I'm making this public so you're gonna have to read between the lines.
[Maybe St. Peter will count this on my CHRISTIAN MISSION WORK]

A close friend of mine missed a court date one time & McFatter/Valeska don't play that shit!

He got a few months & before he went into the state system,
me & one of his girlfriends went down to the jail to give him a little Care Package for Father's Day.

He hadn't put us on his visitation list so we left with our gifts in hand.

Anywayzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

I never wrote this cat off but I stayed away.
FOR YEARS & YEARS & YEARS.
My little son would say, "What happened to Beetle?"
& I'd say, " Oh, his job got him transferred but he'll be back soon."

Over the years we got over most of it but
when in doubt-
STAY AWAY &
Let Time Take It's Course.

Anywayzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

This is my Christmas message.

This is the season to be a family
but it is also a season to bury the hatchet
& don't f***kin' talk about it.

Like Buie said,
JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!!!!


WITHOUT THAT MAN JESUS,

I would NOT
be here right now.
[ anyonezzz who KNOWZZZZZZZZZ me RILL WELL
will sho' nuff testify to dat fact!]

ANYWAYZZZZZZZZZZZ...

I love the Lord's Prayer.

I DEARLY love the 23rd Psalm. [It was my Mama Kate's ENTIRE funeral service]

But THE SERENITY PRAYER does it for me.

Unfortunately, the first version was written by some deluded Socialist/PACIFIST/christian
,ummm,
how do I say it-
creep named Reinhold Niehbuhr http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinhold_Niebuhr .

Anywayzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

I'll forgive him.
Even a blind hog finds an acorn sometime.

Here's my version of the SERENITY PRAYER spoken off the cuff &
the correction based upon the AA version in bold type:



THE SERENITY PRAYER

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Living each[one] day at a time. Enjoying each[one] moment at a time.
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace.

Taking, as Jesus[He] did, this sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it.

Knowing[Trusting] that you[HE] will make all things right if I surrender to your[His] will.

So[no "so" in the prayer] that I may be reasonably happy in this life
& supremely happy with you[Him] forever in the next,
Amen

There's a new movie out I haven't seen yet but I want to.
It's called THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY & it's based upon a book written by Jean-Dominique Bauby http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Diving_Bell_and_the_Butterfly
about him having a massive stroke & living with LOCKED-IN SYNDROME.

It took him 200,000 blinks with his left eyelid to write the book.
Each word took at least two minutes to write & the cat died 10 days after the book was published.

image courtesy of http://www.thedivingbellandthebutterfly-themovie.com/

Image courtesy of http://www.myspace.com/antoniocabrera

HEAPS OF THE BEST FOR THE HOLIDAYZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ,
Please pray for David Daughtry.
He is in a bad way &
I'm sure that Dean & Teresa & others in his family are by his side right now.

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS!

best,
rr

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

HEY Y'ALL:

Tonight I was down at the bar & this girl won a game on the video crack machine, pumped her arms in the air & cheered.

I said," Yeah, winning's great. I remember when the Tide won. Even in basketball."

She replied,"We're gonna kick their asses in gymnastics this year."

Yeah...

& all I could think about was Sarah Paterson demanding excellence...

THE INVINCIBLE SPIRIT OF THE CRIMSON TIDE...

hmmm...

We sure didn't know about it when we were in school...

I remember the words of the Alabama Alma Mater:

SO LIFT HER SKIRT SO GENTLY,
LAY HER IN THE GRASS.
ALL MY DAYS,
I'VE YEARNED AND PRAYED FOR
ONE PIECE
OF KAPPA ASS!

but then, secretly, Coach Bryant eased up on the hair, installed a new offense &
BOOM!!!
We beat Southern Cal!
Oh man!
IT WAS A RIOT!

I love the campus right now.
Always have.
It's Christmas at BAMA.
The rats are starving in the Psychology Dept. 'cause dey ain't nobody home!
THIS PLACE SHUTS DOWN FO' KRITMUH!

Anywayzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

For all of it's warts...
This University is good for everybody in Alabama.
Loyalty to this University erases all religious, political & sexual preference issues between us.
It unifies us toward a single purpose.
VICTORY!


http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=90342509

Designed by KEVIN PAKE

In Wm. Coker's INDIAN TRADERS http://links.jstor.org/sici?sici=0022-0507(198703)47%3A1%3C269%3AITOTSS%3E2.0.CO%3B2-A
He Said That Jay Shuler Was In Possession Of Original Forbes Purchase Items

image courtesy of http://www.libs.uga.edu/darchive/hargrett/maps/1821f6.jpg

From: robert register (robertoreg2003@yahoo.com)

Sent: Sun 12/16/07 11:48 AM

To: jgordon

Mr. Shuler:

I have some people at DOTHAN MAGAZINE
interested in doing an article about THE FORBES PURCHASE.

Is there any chance you could help us?

Best,
Robert Register http://robertoreg.blogspot.com


http://dothanmagazine.com/

On the Forbes Purchase:
http://robertoreg.blogspot.com/2004_02_01_archive.html

HEY BIG DADDY REGISTER!

ALISON DOES THE UNDERLINING IN OUR HOWTZ!!!!!
THANKS FOR YOUR LIST!!!

ROBERT AND ALISON!!!............................................
http://myspace.com/alisonheafner

Dean Daughtry, Robert Nix & Chuck Renaldo
http://www.cwshawsbakerst.com

A Florida Rocks Again! Christmas


Airdates: Sunday December 16th and 23rd, Noon to 2 p.m.
and Wednesday December 19th from 6 to 8 p.m. ET

Oldies 93.3 The Blizzard in Flagler Beach


Listen via Live365 at
TheBlizzard.US


Playlist:

TOM PETTY & THE HEARTBREAKERS: Christmas All Over Again
CHIPPER (THE TROPICS): Groovy Christmas/Toy Soldier
ROYAL GUARDSMEN: Kinda Looks Like Christmas/Snoopy's Christmas
WINSLOW & SANDLIN: Peace Time

RAY CHARLES:
Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town/Winter Wonderland/Little Drummer Boy/Christmas in My Heart/Baby, It's Cold Outside/What Child is This

DORRINDA DUNCAN: It's Christmas Time
KING COLEMAN: Blue Grey Christmas

LYNYRD SKYNYRD:
Skynyd Family Christmas/Christmas Time Again/Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer/Run Run Rudolph/Santa's Messin' With the Kid/Santa Wants Some Lovin'/Mama's Song/Greensleeves

SAM MOORE: Santa Claus is Comin' to Town
BELLAMY BROTHERS: Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree/Silent Night/Old Hippie Christmas/Tropical Christmas
JIMMY BUFFETT: Christmas in the Caribbean
38 SPECIAL: Hallelujah, It's Christmas
KING CURTIS (with DUANE ALLMAN):
What Are You Doing New Year's Eve

Series Hosted by Mal Thursday

Written and Produced by JM Dobies

Co-Produced by Jeff Lemlich
Vote now for the inaugural inductees to the Florida Music Hall of Fame at FloridaHOF.com
Dig the Florida Rocks Again! podcast archives at garagepunk.com


J.M. Dobies
Writer/Producer
FLORIDA ROCKS AGAIN!
THE MAL THURSDAY SHOW
Industrious Communications Inc.
904.806.4934
512.297.2320


RR....
Thanks for your continued support of our BEAR cd.
I wish you and your son a very very merry merry Christmas.
JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON.
BB

Buddy Buie



RR~
Yesterday my 26 yr old son, Drew took me to B'Ham for a doctor's appt. He grumbled that there was nothing on the radio, to which I retorted, "Ahhh, but I've brought some music!" He rolled his eyes & said OK, knowing it wouldn't be his usual heavy metal favorites. Beaverteeth's "Dam It" cd http://myspace.com/adkinsjohnrainey
started playing and after just a few notes of Rodney singing, Drew said, "This sounds just like Atlanta Rhythm Section"! I'm not quite sure when he's heard ARS, unless it was when he was a child & I was listening to them. After hearing all of MY music, he actually said he enjoyed it! Imagine that!
BQ~http://www.myspace.com/fiddledeedeeme
[ed. note: click on the above BAMA QUEEN link for Dan Fogelberg music]

Notes from Old OZweego down on Lake Sousepattaoski:

Subject: Weeweechu



One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting by the side of the ocean.*

* It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."

Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.

Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu.
I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.
"But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita*

Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."*

Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."

*Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....


"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."


Heaps of the best for all of y'all in the next year!
CAN'T WAIT TO '08!
I'm wid Nix on dat!

Tonight I looked at a picture on the Internet of this girl I went to high school with.

Man, she was a glamour girl.
Us guys treated her like she was our very own Marilyn Monroe.

Seeing that picture of her, the way she is today,
wind burned,
with no makeup,
a bandana on her head
made me proud that I know gals like that.

Best,
rr